To BE Present or THE Present -- which makes us happier?

Be Present or The Present

"When asked what gift he wanted for his birthday, the yogi replied, "I wish no gifts, only presence." Unknown

We all know how commercialized all of our holidays have become around the world. What is it that is truly important to each of us? Which makes us happier--presents or presence?

I have 2 boys who both have December birthdays. Now that they're in their teens, they have more input about their gifts. Learning to make choices, serve the community (they volunteer at the local food bank with their dad), and work towards what they want has been key. I have to put a shout out to my family for instilling these values in me so that I could pass them on. Thanks Mom, Dad and Step-Dad. 

I'm not saying that we don't get sucked into buying more than we need. We do.

Being present to what is in front of us IS more important than giving or receiving a gift, BUT gifts are not bad. I love to give little (and big) gifts and I love to receive them. The key is that I need to feel it's a choice and not a requirement. I also need to feel that the gifts I give are useful or needed. A beautiful trinket, a day at the spa, a new set of skis, a great book, all have their place. I think of the yama, aparigraha. We don't want to grasp for more than we need. 

Let's remember to BE present in our gift giving and even more importantly, let's BE present with each other. Ultimately, we'll be happier for a longer time and feel better about ourselves for our presence.

If you live in Salt Lake, each year I offer a Yoga Renewal in my home studio. A day-long reprieve from the holidays where you can let go of any baggage of the year and shift your energy towards being open to possibilities in the new year. I hope to see some of you.

Being Present makes us and those around happier and feel more connected. Here's an interesting infographic on being present.

Please share your experiences of being present below. May you all have a healthy, joyous and peaceful holiday.

"Yoga exists in the world because everything is linked." TKV Desikachar
#bepresent #holidaytradition #yogarenewal

Aparigraha: Letting go of greed

Do we need to live without any possessions to reach enlightenment or to be spiritual? I think not. It's more about having what we need and not taking more than our share.

When we are little, we learn that we need to share. Patanjali explains to us in YS 2.39 अपरिग्रहस्थैर्ये जन्मकथंत संभोधः aparigrahasthairye janmakathamta sambodhah. "One who is not greedy is secure. He has time to think deeply. His understanding of himself is complete," translated by TKV Desikachar. 

Does this mean that we can't have nice, pretty or expensive things? No. Alistair Shearer says, "When we are established in nonattachment, the nature and purpose of existence is understood." We can have what we need and want, whether it's a relationship, a car or a job, yet we need to remain unattached to possessing it. 

When a loved one passes, we are sad, hurt, and angry, but we go on. When our car is in a wreck, we get it repaired. When the job changes, we change with it or we move on.

Aparigraha- non-attachment, non-greediness, non-covetousness, generosity

If we can remained unattached to our possessions, only gather what we need, and share with others our bounty, we will begin to understand ourselves, our nature, our purpose and our connection to the universe. 

What can you let go of in your life? Maybe clean out a closet and donate what you don't use. Do you give when the urge arises or when you see a need? As a family we make regular donations. I still have places where I don't want to share. 

Recently when visiting my sister, she pointed out that I wasn't sharing my favorite crackers with the kids. While I was embarrassed to be confronted, she was right. I always tell my children to share, and I need to practice what I preach.

Where can you make a change?